One dream that visits me often takes me back home. Mother and father, Electra and Orestes are just the way I left them. The whole family wants me back and greets me with tears of joy. 
Mother is ever so grateful to see me alive. She will not have to kill father for sacrificing me.

Father cries the hardest and falls at my feet. He did not kill his daughter after all.
Electra is calm, joyful even. She can quiet herself. She will not have to convince Orestes to kill our mother.
Orestes smiles at me because if I am here, nothing terrible has to happen. He will not have to commit matricide and run from the Furies. 

Eventually, I am left to my own devices, made to wander about the house- my home- seeing everything exactly as I left it, only aged. My clothes, my shoes, all of my belongings that I once cherished now mean nothing. As I sift through possessions, hoping to find something that comforts me, I see shadows move. There is a sense of unease. Despite the fact that my family lives, this house is still haunted. 

I move from room to room, disturbed. The light is wrong. Or is it right and I remember wrong? Or is this something I forgot? A memory that I’ve vanished?
My mother finds me to tell me something very important-

I wake up. I am at Taurus. I serve Artemis, Goddess of the Hunt. My possessions are few and my home is this temple. My father sacrificed me to sail his ships to Troy. My mother murdered my father. My brother murdered my mother. Electra is insane. My family is dead. 

This world is a terrible place and unspeakable things happen to good people. Unfortunately, that process is the only way to make people strong. Once someone has seen so much, there is no unseeing it. A new kind of peace has to be made in order to keep going. 

Even if dreams did come true and I could have my past back, I wouldn’t want it.

Advertisements